Meet up again. :)

Monday, 21th of April 2013 we met up again!

As always, we shared everything!

Beautiful ones.

20.04 it's my day!

Yesterday was my birthday. And i got a surprise from my friends and my boyfriend. I love them all. I got a present, and it's a tee. As same as Kurt Cobain's tee. Well, my bf knows me well :)

Accidentally, The Kooks.

Heyyaaaa.. Goodnight!! For you.. Yess you!!!! Have a nice weekend and keep your head up! Today will be your day!!! Good morning.. Good morning... 😊

Shweell. Its too dark to write something about past. Well, let the light show me the right path and finish my story now. First one, i dont know what to share about. And second, it's too late to tell about some long story. And third, i'm lil sleepy.
So, i kindly wanna share my randomly story. Started from.. Uhm.. The Kooks. Oke, them! Well, i started to listen their songs lately, it kinda made me depressed cause they really have something. Something that i cant explain. Their songs, just like a perfection. Ooh La.. Is their first single that made me love 'em. And after that, i tried to listened their other songs. And its like a treasure, well, they're so damn great. I lurve it❤
Check them out..
http://youtu.be/3UIYasZ_F3w

A Teacher.

Here i am, in 8th semester. Which is all of my subjects was done. And i just started to compose a thesis and also do some PPKT ( practise to teaching in school). First, it's kinda scary, because actually i never teach at school before. But i trust my self that i can handle it. Then, surprisingly, it's not as scary as my first thought, i teach in SMP Nusantara Plus where the sudents are so noisy. First, it's easy to handle them, because they're just interested with their new teacher. And so did i, i interested with my new students too. But lately, they become so noisy. I dont know how to handle it. Sometime i just ignore them, and sometimes i got angry. But they're my students. So i just have to take it as my lessons. I learn from them. And they learn from me too. Well here I am, with a teacher's outfits. Lol, look different, ah?? 😁✌

-

"holding my baby is the best drug in the world" - Kurt Cobain

Imagine

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people living for today

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people living life in peace

You, you may say
I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one
I hope some day you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people sharing all the world

You, you may say
I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one
I hope some day you'll join us
And the world will live as one

Between Two Words.

Why we cant live in peace? Why can't we walked together in harmony? Its just like darn! Your past is bullied you. I just started to think that, well, i really need to take a breath. From everything, from everyone. This was seem so crazy! I can't controlled my self.


I've been through a lot of things lately. I don't know if it makes me stronger, or its only drowned me. I can't thinking crystal clear right now. The black clouds is around my head. It just like, they gave me a little rainbow smile and then gave me the rainy cry.


"I am I, you are you, we are we, we could live in such harmony"

Why we can't walk together? With peace and no differences. Everything will be much better if we take our differences into another side. We walked together for one reason, Peace!

Live, love, life is simple, but people makes it harder. How dare you said if life fuck you all? Life never did it, you fuck your own life. See, my friends, it's da truth.

And for now, all i really wanted is peace. I don't wanna meet every single person that I hate, every single person that have a plan to ruined my life. It just like, i dont wanna make my self like an idiot, i dont wanna life in my bad anymore.

Well, my bad. I fucked up everybody around me. I didn't meant it. Sorry. But seriously, for someone who have a plan to ruin my life, its pleased to meet you. Go on. It's only make me more stronger, and it really open my mind, that you're not good enough to be count in as whatever. True say. You can destroy me like whatever you planned about, but here one thing, "you must promised yourself that you'll never regret it!" Cuz after all, all you can see is i'm falling down. My family hates me, and you'll laugh. I cried. I tell all the truth. No more chances for us. We're done. We're literary fucking done. well i can started to build my own life. MY OWN LIFE! a brand new beginning. Life fuck me hard. I know that, and i'll fuck myself off to get my life back. Back to be better.

And now. After i dedicating all of my hate to someone who wanted to ruin me. I would like to say Thank you. Thank you for everyone who come clear into my life. My friends, Yayah, Rusda, Arvin, my crush, Daniel. Who really supported me. After everything i've been through. I say my thanks' from the deepest of my heart. You're all my dope. My pain killer. My moodbooster.

I'm glad to have you in my life. How can i expressed all my love for you all? Idk. I just maybe crazy without you all. This is what i called tragedies. But really meaningful for my life. I hope you'll learn something from this. Dont be as bad as me. Hehe.
Honestly, i cant hold my tears until right now. I've been through my hard day's night. And now my happiness was gone. Thanks for being who you are. Everyone. You're really got a hold on me :)



Life is honest.

Happy Birthday Kurt Donald Cobain

Thanks for being such a greatest inspiration!

Awful.

Tadaaaaa.

Coba deh kamu perhatiin, berapa banyak isi postingan di blog ini dengan judul beda yang padahal isinya sama??
Hahahaha.. sudah-sudah jangan terlalu mengangkat tinggi dagumu untuk menertawakan ini!
Yaaaaa. begitulah hidup. Kadang kita bertahan pada suatu kesalahan, tapi selalu ada jalan keluar. Untuk merubah semuanya.
-Sekian.

Vampire Weekend - Oxford Comma

First time I listening this song when I watched "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" and I just like.. Whoaaaa... this is a good songs. and for the record, i just have a time like right now to post this video. and you can also search and check their songs on youtube anyway. so, here the lyric.

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?
I've seen those English dramas too
They're cruel
So if there's any other way
To spell the word
It's fine with me, with me

Why would you speak to me that way
Especially when I always said that I
Haven't got the words for you
All your diction dripping with disdain
Through the pain
I always tell the truth

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford climber?
I climbed to Dharamsala too
I did
I met the highest lama
His accent sounded fine
To me, to me

Check your handbook
It's no trick
Take the chapstick
Put it on your lips
Crack a smile
Adjust my tie
Know your boyfriend, unlike other guys

Why would you lie about how much coal you have?
Why would you lie about something dumb like that?
Why would you lie about anything at all?
First the window, then it's to the wall
Lil' Jon, he always tells the truth

Check your passport
It's no trick
Take the chapstick
Put it on your lips
Crack a smile
Adjust my tie
Know your butler, unlike other guys
Why would you lie about how much coal you have?
Why would you lie about something dumb like that?
Why would you lie about anything at all?
First the window, then it's through the wall
Why would you tape my conversations?
Show your paintings
At the United Nations
Lil' Jon, he always tells the truth

Green Day-Like A Rolling Stone (Bob Dylan's Cover)

So, guys. i've been listening Bob Dylan songs for many times. and here i bring you great cover of Like a rolling stone, and it's covered by Green Day! So, enjoy (;

Time Travel

Nothing is real
I know this cause I made a deal
With the devil
He told me that I was just wasting my time on the moon

So I flew to the sun
Lost track of my soul on the run
Suffering 12 degree burns
I learned that the sun was no fun

So I went back to earth
Tripped and fell in the glorified dirt
Honestly, gravity sees me as a liability

So I held my breath
Til my soul left my body for dead
I ripped through the clouds
To talk with the man in the sky

I said
"Take this for what it is
I think you're a tad bit prejudice
Against the ones like us that are searching for the answers"

He said
"Kid you don't know shit
You should go back home and live
In that quiet little town you left behind"

I'm coming home
Don't you cry (don't you cry)
I'm coming home
Just in time (just in time)

I am a fake
A constant go-getter of fate
I lost track of time
I carried my mind on a plate

I seasoned it well
With acid and M.D.M.A.
Then I howled at the moon
Til the sun burnt out both of my eyes

So I checked my pulse
Standing there white as a ghost
I lacked a complexion
And stabbed my reflection 12 times

So I held my breath
Til my soul left my body for dead
I ripped through the clouds
To talk with the man in the sky

I said
"Take this for what it is
I think you're a tad bit prejudice
Against the ones like us that are searching for the answers"

He said
"Kid you don't know shit
You should go back home and live
In that quiet little town you left behind"

I'm coming home
Don't you cry (don't you cry)
I'm coming home
Just in time (just in time)

I don't know what I've been told
I will sell my soul
To rock and roll

I don't know where to go
I have lost control
Oh, no

I don't know what I've been told
I will sell my soul
To rock and roll

I don't know where to go
I have lost control
Oh, no

I don't know what I've been told
I will sell my soul
To rock and roll

I don't know where to go
I have lost control
Oh, no

I don't know what I've been told
I will sell my soul
To rock and roll

I don't know where to go
I have lost control
Oh, no

Love One Another.

“We held hands. It’s funny, even at the height of our friendship, as guys, you’d never hold hands. I sat with him for a few hours when he was in treatment about 10 days from his death. We joked about things – just amusing, nutty stuff. It was good. It was like we were dreaming. He was my little baby brother, almost, because I’d known him that long”.

 - Paul McCartney talking about George’s death

Christofer Drew Ingle. Quotes and Lyric (:

Shweel, I just compiled a lot of his quotes from twitter and his lyric. So, I hope y'll enjoy (;


"I’m friends with everybody, I love everybody. I trust everybody because they don’t give me reasons not to… you know what I’m saying? So, if everybody just trusted everybody and if everybody just loved everybody then we’d live in a perfect world… you know what I’m saying? I mean, why not?"
-Christofer Drew

"i don’t think before i speak, i just say… you know what i mean… and i don’t think people get that…"
-Christofer Drew

"You're only as tall as your heart will let you be, you're only as small as the world will make you seem."

"In this world of hate there has to be a light. Be that light and spread some love, maybe this day the youth can make a difference."

"You make me happy, whether you know it or not."

"Desire is the root of selfishness; clear your heart of desire and be selfless. Selflessness is the key to inner peace."

"If you focus on the flaws of others it takes away from the improvements that you may need to make."

"Baby, I love you. I never want to let you go."

"I am I, you are you, we are we. We could live in such harmony."

"I like you. Girl, you don't got nothing to prove to me. I know that times have been rough, for the both of us."

"You see, this world has lots to offer, but in time it will go dark. And if this love is what we say it is, I'm sure we will go far. With a girl as sweet as you, there's not much else I can do, but fall for you."

"I know that you think of me sometimes. 'Cause all I do is think of you at night. I know that it may take a little time, for you to see, you are the love of my life."

"So good that i'm so bad, i guarantee i be the greatest thing you ever had."

"Music brings us life, when we are dead. An honest melody, to break the trend. And music brings us hope, for future peace. Humanity will sing, in harmony. I pray for that day."

"We start a war, but what's it for? We fight for peace; peace will find us with harmony. So trade your guns, and fire with doves. We fight for love; love will find us with harmony."

"And all I ever wanted was to feel loved"

"I know that it sounds crazy, baby, but all I do, is think of you"

"Every single time I look into your eyes, I see a little bit more sunshine. I feel a little bit more like me, instead of who I turned out to be. I wouldn't trade it for a thing. Can I call you my baby?"

 "Yeah, I've got friends. But they have friends. And they have parties. And I'm so awkward. So what do you say, just as friends, we see a movie, this weekend?"

"So if you have a problem, I thoroughly suggest you look within, before you go and blame someone who's been blaming someone else, their whole life."

"And you could move on with your whole life, just like you do, just like you shoobeedo, do, do. But you could make everything all right, and I want you to."

"Loving yourself, is loving the universe."

"You are me and i am you."

"Your food is you medicine."

"don't think."

"I think you should stop acting so cool and put on your boogie shoes, i wanna see you boogie."

"And I am praying for the days when you and i and he and she are we and humanity will sing harmony."

"I'm kinda fed up with all this advice never a sign should i stay should i go away all to find the better half of me."

"Im scared the world is gonna change, with out me."

"Is it so wrong, is it so wrong to be in love."
 
"Hello mister funny man you've hidden who you are."

 "And all i see in you is another mistake right over my shoulder and now i see who you are."

 -What's not to adore??

Kurt Cobain

A Random Pics of Kurt. D. Cobain.

Dear, Friend.

Dear, Elma Helvia Sukandar.

hehe I know it's weird for you to read this shit. but here I am. :D

sebenernya sih pengen ngomong langsung sama lo. cuma ya lo tau lah, gue takut nantinya jadi canggung karena kita udah lama nggak ngobrol. Jadi ya cuma ini yang bisa gue lakukan, nulis. Apa juga gue mah gue tulis ya, hehehe.

Ya gue harap lo punya banyak waktu biar bisa ngebaca isi postingan gue ini sampe tuntas, soalnya kalo gue liat-liat, lo supersibuk banget akhir-akhir ini. karena jujur aja banyak banget yang ingin gue omongin. hehehe.. bukan gue omongin sih sebenernya, tapi gue sampaikan. Dan setelah lo baca ini, jujur aja gue gak pengen respon lo yang nantinya bakalan gede kepala, gue cuma minta kedewasaan lo aja hehehe

Pertama, gue mau minta maaf, dengan segala kerendahan hati gue. Ya gue taulah lo, gue, sama sama punya kesalahan. Mungkin ada kata-kata gue yang nyakitin lo, perlakuan gue yang nyakitin lo, atau mungkin juga sebaliknya. Gue harap kita bisa sama-sama saling ngerti aja. dan balik lagi ke awal, gue cuma minta maaf lo aja, lebih baik lagi kalo kita bisa saling memaafkan. Gue sadar el, terlalu lama kita diem-dieman kayak gini. Dan jujur aja, sebenernya gue pun kangen. kangen saat saat kita barengan. kita jalan bareng, becanda bareng, ngegosip bareng, curhatan bareng, terlalu banyak waktu yang kita lewatin bareng-bareng.

Gue pun kenal lo bukan baru, hampir 5 tahun. bahkan lebih, rasanya aneh aja kalo kita tiba-tiba jadi sama-sama dingin gini. Jadi inget waktu awal masuk SMA, awal dimana kita sama-sama sendiri, awal masa-masa kita harusnya mencari temen, karna itu hari pertama dikelas. Gue dan elo, sama-sama melakukan berbagai basa-basi yang kemudian bikin kita jadi deket. Kita jadi sering cerita tentang masalah kita, pengalaman kita, semuanya tentang kita. Sampe akhirnya kita bener-bener deket. Dan kita pun main selalu bertiga, gue lo dan bacel. Betapa dewasanya kita dibanding bacel yang dulu masih sensitif dan suka ngambek kalo dibecandain. sementara kita, mau becanda, kesel gimana pun, kita gak pernah berantem ya el. sekalinya bernatem pun paling kesel sehari itu doang, setelah itu kita baikan lagi. Dulu serasa masalah gampang banget untuk terpecahkan. simple buat kita untuk menyelesaikannya, bahkan simple juga buat meredam ego kita masing-masing. Tapi kenapa skrg semua terasa beda ya? atau mungkin karena umur yang bertambah, membuat semua masalah kita jadi  makin kompleks?? Bukan masalah lagi buat gue, karna saat ini gue menghapuskan segala ego gue, untuk minta maaf sama lo dan berharap hubungan pertemanan kita yang lebih baik selanjutnya.

lo tuh udah bukan sahabat lagi bagi gue, lo tuh udah gue anggap seperti saudara gue sendiri. Terlalu banyak kesedihan dan  kesenangan yang kita lewating bareng-bareng el. walaupun setahun terakhir ini hubungan kita nggak baik, gue pengen lo tau aja, kalo di sisa-sisa masa kuliah ini, gue tetep pengen temenan sama lo. gue masih pengen kita berhubungan baik, walau mungkin gak bisa kaya dulu lagi, seenggaknya gue mau nyoba lagi el. gue pengen ngobrol lagi sama lo, curhat-curhatan lagi, jalan bareng lagi, ngeggosip lagi :p semua yang dulu sering kita lakuin. semuanya gue kangen.

Gue nggak peduli, orang mau ngomong apa tentang postingan blog gue ini, gue cuma mau numpahin semua perasaan gue aja. Terlalu lama kita diem-dieman el. gue gak mau ini terjadi semakin lama dan lama.. dan nantinya gue semakin gak mengenal lo. Gue masih pengen kita baik-baik aja. Terlalu banyak kenangan indah yang kita lewatin bareng el. gue cuma nggak mau semuanya terlambat. gue gak mau terlambat buat ngungkapin ini semua, sampe akhirnya lo bener-bener ngelupain gue dan benci sama gue. 

Anyway. gue tau waktu kita sekelompok tugas apa ya, gue rada lupa, yang sama jisung juga, lo ngerasa tersindir ya sama gue di twitter? Maaf, serius itu bukan gue yang mulai. dan gue nggak ngejelekin lo. Tapi kalo lo ngerasa tersinggung ya gue minta maaf aja ya :)

Dan terakhir, gue gak peduli gimana hubungan lo sama temen-temen yang lain, karena itu bukan urusan gue, dan disini gue cuma mau memperbaiki hubungan gue sama lo, gue gak peduli orang lain bilang apa, karena semua gue sendiri yang ngerasain. gue lebih baik dicengin atau dijelekin sama orang nantinya dari pada harus kehilangan sahabat gue. gue harap setelah lo baca ini, lo bisa ngerti ya el. semoga lo bisa dewasa buat nanggepin postingan gue ini. Thanks anyway udah sempetin baca :')

P.S. gue kangen kita jalan bareng lagi, dan kayaknya kita harus ngobrol banyak. Text me when you're ready ya el, gue yakin hubungan kita bisa membaik setelah ini! Amin, have a nice day :)

Nowadays.

is it still 16th of December?? great! i don't wanna waste this day.
can i talk?? i really need someone to talk about. is it okay if i talk here?? i guess yess, because i just realized that i have no one to talked about. this day, everything looks crystal clearer. perfect day, for being alone and dying. nothing much to do. nothing much to think about. i just feel, lonely. everything is messed up. i messed up, and i fucking messed up. i don't even finished my thesis proposal for tomorrow, i'm not even get ready for starting my monfuckingday tomorrow. seriously. it just like hell, my sorrows began. i just really need to ended this fucking shit sooner. seriously, write a blog is 100% more effective for me than make a thesis. it sucks, you being under the rule. so, here i am. procrastinator. a lazy girl with a bad habit. but it's ok for me. for now. i don't need to think much about college. i started to think that they were never think about me. lol :p
so, that was my life with my messy collage stuff. i don't even have a pen. lol :p
so, maybe today is 17 because it's 00.24 right now but i don't care, at least i started to write a day before. hehehe what a long way to write. i don't even have something to talk about. this night, so windy. so painful.
so, i'm gonna talked about my emptiness here. my mom just told me that "you don't need to hate someone who did something bad to you, or even they lied so much, cause in fact, they still be your friends, and don't ever forget about their kindness to you, they ever life in your live and help you out from your problem, they ever accompanied you when you're down, and they are... just them... let they become themselves. You don't need to be worried, they will be good forever to you, as long as you good to them." it just feel like "Something".. "something" really "something". i feel it, and i did the wrong choice. for everything. i swear to god. I'm wrong.
for the last thing, it only about choice. and also chance. chance to make it better, and choice to make it best. and i will. make it better, make it good. insya allah.
well, i'm screwing my relationship, well but it's not my fault if I am so stubborn. it was your fault to make your own mistakes. or error maybe. nah.. mistakes. i ever tried to complained about it before. so its the real mistakes. i'm screwed it, but you're just an asshole who only pointed me fucking back in every single problem. you. you made all of your story was my fault. my fucking fault. you. who tell everyone i'm a drama queen behind your castle of drama dream land. bitch!
i'm good. literary good right now. i feel better. just so you know. you're not the only one who can blame someone else. me too. me three. it's real.
as long as you and me being a motherfucking childish. i will keep this distance away. even it's hurt, for me, i dont know about you. maybe you feel better. its all right. your turn. but i will still keep this. until one day, we see a sunshine. we or only you or only me. its okay. and it's fine.